Finding Yourself Before Finding Love | Becky Larson Bloom - Author Conversations with Chris Dabbs

Hi, and welcome to all the conversations. I'm Chris Dabbs, as usual, and today I'm joined by Becky Larson Bloom who is a wonderful, wonderful person with me having a chat just before we started it. It's all good fun, I've got to say. So, let's get into the book. One of the person that you've been searching for isn't simply, well, the love of your life, but the version of yourself you've been waiting to become. Hang on a second, that sounds interesting. In new beginnings, Becky Larson Bloom explores the lives of two people brought together unexpectedly, right?

Each carrying in securities hopes and unanswered questions about who they really are. As their relationship perks have developed, they begin discovering strengths they never knew they possessed. Reminding us that sometimes the biggest adventure isn't falling in love, it's learning to believe in yourself. Today we'll talk about writing romance with emotional honesty, drawing from personal experience, and what it's never too late to begin a new chapter. Becky Blasenblum, welcome to all the conversations.

Lovely to see you. Thank you. So, there we are. I can see your finger, by the way, in the camera just for you know. Before we talk about the novel itself, what made you first decide that now was the right time to finally write new beginnings? Well, I've always loved writing ever since I was a little girl. When I was married, I had a beautiful mother-in-law who believed in everything with me. I do a lot of music, and I play the piano, and I played the guitar, and you know, just to put anything I can get my hands on.

She believed in that, and she just told me she's Becky, you should write a book. She probably would not, she'd be happy I wrote this book, but she probably wouldn't like the genre that I chose, but, you know, she'd still be happy that I finally did this. She's wanted me to do this for many, many years, and she's no longer with me, so. But you believed in you, I should say. You know, believed in me like crazy. When I married, I got married when I was 18 years old, so I was just a kid, and she just taught me everything, absolutely everything.

Better than my mother, I hate to say, but like I said, she was a beautiful woman. Well, that's lovely isn't it? I mean, we all need someone like that to believe in us, don't we? Yeah. That's great. That's good. So as far as the story to him, son, has it been, you know, waiting to be written for years and years, you know? No, I think within the last maybe five years, five, six years, that's when I finally, I finally put it all together. It started out as just a story that I had written. Very good friend of mine.

I sent him just the story, and he got back to me and he says, "Becky, you should really make a book out of this. You should send this into somebody." So, between my mother and my niece, gentlemen, was a very good friend of mine. It kind of fell into place. Brilliant. Well, that's what I think. That makes it not a lot easier, doesn't it? I mean, yeah, so you did you write this more obviously? You did later in life, right? I guess. I think I think I was probably about 67, 68 when I started writing it, and I think I published it.

It might have been like 70 when it got published at all, or had it published. I didn't do it. All right. But no, brilliant. I mean, I think that's the whole point, isn't it? Because sometimes we think that, you know, if I don't write it now, I never will. I mean, no. Did you ever think that? Is that something that came up? And then when I lost my mother-in-law, that's when I said, "I really have to do this in her honor." Like I said, she probably would not have chosen. Wouldn't have approved of what I wrote, but she would have been very pleased that I did finally write something and have it published.

Oh, yeah, exactly. Oh, excellent. Well, okay. So, let's talk about the book that. I mean, you know, it all begins with people searching for, I guess, something more from life, right? Yeah. I mean, was that always the heart of the story? I mean, all the characters come first or the message? You know, what happened? I think it was because although the book is fictional, I did put a lot of my own personal life in there. I didn't always have a happy life, I didn't have a happy marriage. So, that's why, you know, that's why she ended up on a beach.

Because that was part of me, I needed an escape and that was it. Well, I mean, yeah, your author notes says that the novel contains pieces of your own dreams, and your hopes and your regrets as well. I mean, so it really did become very personal, then, I guess. And I think that's probably what made the words flow when I did start to write. I've never ever had a problem writing things. I mean, even when I was a kid, I had a couple of poems published that. Well, you look at the poems now and you go, "Oh, my goodness, did I really write that?"

But, you know, so yeah, I've always enjoyed writing and doing things like this. And I had, I would keep journals and and then just use pieces of that and stories that I would send to people. And so yeah, it just kind of went from there. Oh, excellent. That's good as well. That's lovely. See? So, it's been a life long sort of love, then, writing. Yes. And in my book, I know I believe I did say that, you know, parts of my life were they weren't happy and I was held back from a lot of things and that was one thing that I didn't get support on from when I was married.

I didn't get support from my spouse on that. So, that was something that I needed to do for myself because he didn't support me on a lot of that stuff. Well, that's good, then. So, you sound a little bit like your own heroine there, I think. I think so. The gal in the story probably would be who I would be if I could have changed my life, you know. Okay, well, without giving too much away then, who is she then? When do we first meet her? Meet her right away. It begins with her on the beach, deciding that you needed to do something more with her life.

And both. Okay. So, one of the lovely ideas, I guess. And that was like parasailing and scuba diving and surfing and all that stuff. Things that she had never, ever done before and always wanted to. But never had the opportunity to do it. I don't know. I decided that she needed to make a change and just get on with it. And just do it. Yeah, do it. Don't be afraid. Don't let anybody hold you back. That's actually really good, isn't it? I think that's a good move. And I think that more people are finding that, aren't they?

Especially as you were saying, you know, if it's if they're if she's based kind of roughly or new, you know, we all get there. I think it's been become old. There's all those things that we want to. Yeah. Yes, that's very true. I you know, I have two grandchildren and now I tell my grandchildren, don't ever let anybody tell you you can't do something. Just go ahead and do it. And so you have you don't want to have regrets in your life. You know, I'm 73 years old and I'm and I'm not living those regrets.

No, I'm doing things that I never could do before. So it's never too late. There you go. So he's never too that exactly. Well, one of the lovely ideas I like run this running through the book is that love changes people. You know, which is quite interesting. I think we can't know that, don't we? But we don't, you know, when we're younger, I think we lose touch with friends and all that sort of stuff when when family starts and new friends come along, you know, I mean childhood friends and things.

So Vincent said, yeah, let us know about that. I mean, you know, the characters they grow together as well, don't they? It's not just like him. Yeah, it wasn't just her that didn't know what to do. He was looking for, he was looking for something to them. The their hearts just melded together. If that's the right word, I don't know. It sounds like me. Yeah, yeah, absolutely. Okay. So I mean, I guess that's what makes the relationship feel sort of believable really because neither person's perfect, right?

It's them. Which is exactly the same with my wife. Neither of us are perfect. Although I do like to tell her that I am, but I don't think she really weighs with that. She doesn't, yeah, she doesn't. But anyway, oh, sorry, this stage I'm supposed to say that she is, right? Okay, I'll get it. Enough gags. Anyway, I mean, really, I mean, I think because neither person's perfect, you know, the flaws that you show are more important to write than the strengths, I think, in order to be able to get people to sort of, you know, to understand and I guess relate to the story, right?

That's very true. Yes. Yeah. So with the new beginnings, the title, I guess does that mean what I think it means in terms of you no longer be married and moving on from there? Right, right. I had, yeah, like I said, I didn't have a very happy marriage and I stayed way too long in a marriage, in a loveless marriage or a one-sided marriage, I guess I could say and and I always knew that when I wrote this book when it started coming out like this and because I did use so many of my own personal experiences, I always knew that the title was going to be new beginnings because that's what I'm doing now.

Everything is new to me. After all these years, working, supporting myself and, you know, going on trips and doing all this stuff that I couldn't do with Thor or so. So yeah, new beginnings was, I just like I said, I just always knew that was going to be the name of the book because it is, everything was new. Yeah, no, totally. And I mean, you know, you're in a world of, after all, every time you, right, modern relationships, they're complicated nowadays, right? Yeah. Yeah, you know, truths in love and, you know, I think that sometimes it's really difficult to find trust, right?

I think. Yes. It is very much so. That is one thing I do still have trouble with because, you know, one's trust is broken. It's hard to share that with anybody. Well, no, exactly. You know, I think that is, that's the thing we all feel though, isn't it? You know, I mean, it depends, of course. If you're in a, in a relationship, as you say, which was one side, it and that sort of thing, you know, without going into your particular situation, are you other people also go through that? Don't they? Or definitely yes.

Yeah. And it can't be a good thing, obviously. But, you know, the trust part of it, it's funny that you said once your trust is broken because it's me, I was just thinking about being not trusting somebody. In other words, I'm not going to give that person the key to my car, right? Just said, but that's really simple. That's too simplistic for this. But you're talking about trust of your heart, aren't you? That you're not going to be hurt or anything like that. Yeah. And, and that's not really good either because you do need to show trust in some people.

And that's how you build yourself back up again. Wow. Yeah. Yeah. I mean, I think that's the thing though, is it? At the end of the day, do they end up sharing each other's cars? Is this a right? Sequel, no. Well, that always helps. So, I mean, you're carrying your characters. They're always a bit concerned, right? About losing each other or sort of like losing out or, you know, the relationship breaking up as we all kind of are, right? I mean, what do you think about that insecurity then? Do you think that every relationship has that and has to overcome it?

I think it does. And yeah. And I think they did in a story I think that they did and I think they helped each other. It gives out. Right. Right. So, which is, yeah, which is something I have to say. Okay. Well, identity, I think, also another character. Oh, you did discover someone she didn't know she was going to be. No, right. Exactly. So, I mean, were you thinking about more about the romance side of it or about just becoming comfortable with ourselves? I think, I think both of it came together.

I think the romance part of it did help her become more comfortable with her.

That's, well, that's, that's nice. I mean, did any characters that you were writing? Oh, sorry, Becky. Go on. Okay. It's, and just to grow. I mean, once you're comfortable with yourself and, and comfortable sharing yourself with someone else, then you do, you do grow. But you did, well, it is something, isn't it? To have a relationship like that and to be able to share everything? That's the way everybody's relationship should be. That's, that's the fantasy part, I guess, because not everybody, not everybody can have that.

No, that is true. That is true. Or, yeah, I think that's rewriting this book. Do you think it's changed you in any way? I think it's helped me. Yes, I think it has helped me grow. I'm not as afraid to try to do things and get out there. When I went and applied for that job, that is something I never would have done before. I just decided I was going to do that. I never put myself out like that. You know, so yeah, I think it helps. Wow. So, I mean, is that, so your job that you currently do, right?

Is that the first job that you've had because of it? No. I have, I have wonderful jobs. I mean, my goodness, I was a security guard out in airport in Duluth. I was a security guard there, even carried a weapon for a while. I was at a pet shop and I, when I did retire the first time I worked in healthcare. And I worked with people that had Alzheimer's disease and that was very challenging, but I really enjoyed that job. But my favorite job of all was working at the airport when I was younger. It's like I got to meet many celebrities.

All right. So you were in the VIP pocket, my God, a man. It was good. I had retired from the healthcare job and and then my grandchildren were born. So I spent the next maybe 13 years helping raise my grandchildren. No, when they got older and went to school, then I just sat at the house and I went, sit here, I just can't do it anymore. I have to have something to do. So, yeah. There's a new beginning for you then, wasn't it? I'm often. Yeah. Let's work at our local Walmart, but I work back in the receiving and claims department.

And it's challenging and it's busy. But you know, it's a perfect set for me right now. I don't know when I'm going to retire again, but I suppose good soon. Retire again. I mean, no surely not, surely not, but I think that's really good as well. You know, I mean, I've said really good a lot, I think we're talking to you today. So it shows you how positive you are because you're making me feel really super positive, right? So thinking about that then, if someone was standing in a bookshop, right?

Or browsing online and they thought, oh, that sounds interesting, right? Or they picked up your book for the first time. What would you hope that they discovered inside it apart from pages? I would hope that they would discover that life was for living. I mean, you know, don't hold anything back. Be happy. Take, take chances. And just put yourself out there and have fun. Don't hurt anybody, but put yourself out there and have a good time. That's what I would like them to get away out of that block.

And yeah, just not to let anybody tell you you can't do something. And what would you hope that they told their friends, you know, because everyone likes to tell people, oh, I've just read this book. It's great. That's what I would hope they would say. Exactly that. Go out there. Enjoy your life. I have gotten positive. From the people that have bought it, a lot of my friends, of course, have bought the book and they've enjoyed it. And I shocked them, I know. But they thought it was really, really good, very well written.

And so, yeah, that's what I would want everybody to have a chance to do it like that, or, you know, I've reaction to something that wrote. Well, see, this is good. I mean, I like the way that we have, we've kind of skirted around the story, right? Because I don't want any spoilers, because I think that but tell me, give me a spoiler, right? Something, you know, I mean, it's not just a sort of, we would call it, I don't know, would you as well, Mills and Boone? Do you know what that is? That's a publisher who I think in the UK really.

Oh, yeah. Yeah, publishes like, romance novels, but I mean, properly serious romance novels. I think yours is a little bit, a little bit more adult than that, if you know what I mean. Yes. Yeah. So what would you give us a spoiler? How do they go? How does this happen? And can we expect more stories of these characters? Boy, that I don't know. I mean, that's a hard one.

They just, once they meet and she does all, he was a, he was a, oh, what's the word? Did the flying, the pair, the parasailing and that's how she first met him and, and then he owned this shop and he took her surfing, shorter how to surf and do all these other things and, and just how they're, I don't know if there is a spoiler, maybe I never even gave them one. Well, okay, well, no, that's fine. I think telling us a little bit. I have, I did not name them until the very last sentence of the book.

Right. There were no names in that book until the very last sentence. That's the spoiler. Yeah, exactly. Which is why I haven't mentioned anything like that. So yeah, well, listen, I tell you what, I think that I think we've run out of time, unfortunately. We could talk for hours, right? But I was the depth to do this, you know, you really made me feel at ease. Oh, good. I'm really glad I'm happy because, you know, that's, that's what I want for you. And, you know, that's why I wanted for our listeners as well to understand an author.

It can be nervous, you know, it's not just what I'm coming on and doing this and walking off again. This is tough stuff, right? Yes, it is. But yeah, do the first one and, and maybe there'll be more. Well, listen, Becky, nice to meet you. Thank you very, very much for joining me on author conversations today. New beginnings reminds us that life, well, it rarely unfolds exactly as we expect. Sometimes, love arrives unexpectedly, sometimes confidence that arrives quietly. And sometimes beginning a game simply means believing that tomorrow doesn't have to look like yesterday, does it?

No. Very cool. Thank you so much. I appreciate your time. That was great to talk to you. Oh, great. Thank you. And you, but whether you readers come for the romance or stay for the message of hope and self-discovery, Becky Larson Bloom has written this story about embracing change and finding the courage to become the person that you're meant to be. So Becky Larson Bloom, once again, thank you very much for joining on author conversations. Thank you very much. Talk to you later. I hope so. Again.

Exactly. Bye. Bye. [Music]